There's a proverbial purple elephant in the room that no one in college football wants to talk about this week. When the University of Florida rolls into Oxford, Mississippi on Saturday, the two greatest forces in the world will be placed in direct opposition. No, it's not a faceoff between quantum chromodynamics and quantum electrodynamics, it's not Channing Crowder's helmet against FSU players, it's worse than all of this. We shall see the confrontation between The Tebow and The Orgeron.
The world, circa September 23, 2007?
The Orgeron is 250 lbs. of raw Cajun manmeat, while The Tebow is quite possibly Jesus. The Orgeron will scream at you mercilessly in what seems to be a foreign tongue, while The Tebow will make you try to offer him your wife/girlfriend/sex buddy as you bring him a roasted leg of lamb and an ice-cold Pepsi-Cola.
In terms of internet legends, these two are probably the kings of the college football world. Tales of their exploits abound across the blogosphere, and the blend of myth and truth is nigh impossible to separate. There's only one thing I'm sure of when it comes to what will happen when these modern-day incarnations of Mars and Jupiter are within 50 feet of one another on Saturday: no one will get out alive.
But goddammit, it'll be worth it.